Support circle grows for suicide loss survivors

ANTIGONISH – A new support group for suicide loss survivors is creating a safe, lasting space to grieve, heal and connect.

Founded by the Rev. Natasha Brubaker, the support group received more than $3,000 last year from the local board of health to offer the monthly help sessions for the public at St. Paul’s Anglican Church in Antigonish.

Ms. Brubaker moved to Antigonish County in 2022 and started the support group the next year. Soon after moving to the community, she had learned of the suicides of two young local men. They weren’t directly connected to her parish, but word got to her through church members. She wondered how much support was available in the community for those grieving a suicide loss.

Unfortunately, she had a close link to the topic: Ms. Brubaker lost her mother to suicide. “The question felt personal and urgent,” she explained. Plus, she figured, there were people grieving other past tragedies who may not have received support.

“Grief after suicide has its own contours,” said Ms. Brubaker. “It’s a traumatic loss, often complicated, and it requires special care and a safe, intentional space with people who understand its dynamics.”

The goal of the meetings is to help people understand “they’re not losing their minds, that what they’re experiencing is normal and that they’re not alone,” she adds.

Ms. Brubaker has since stepped away from the program, passing the reins to new help who are continuing the valuable work. At each monthly session, there’s a candle-lighting ritual to open the space, then a check-in to gauge how people are doing that day, that week or over the past month. A topic gets introduced, usually focused on what may have been broached by the group in a previous session, but the bulk of the time is left open for people to respond and talk. Participants are encouraged to speak from “I” statements, and not to give advice, interrupt or monopolize.

While Ms. Brubaker no longer has an active voice in the healing circle, she feels the program is in good hands. “Part of my role as clergy is helping others discover their gifts and how they can care for their neighbours,” she explained. “I try to cultivate that, create space for others to step in and then step back myself. So, I see the evolution of this group as a very good thing.”

Nova Scotia Health